Letters to You

I am going to tell you something that I’m not supposed to admit as a parent; I don’t know everything. I never have. I don’t know what to do about a lot of things. It’s scary when you reach adulthood and you realize that everyone is just making everything up as they go along. No one admits that because it’s

I can't be around you right now. I can't handle it. I just keep hearing the words that we both threw at each other last night and I can't stand to sit here and make small talk with everyone else like they weren’t all there, while those not so distant shouts echo in my mind. I can't be around you today, and tomorrow might

I love you because you aren't a person. You won't ask me how my day is or prattle on about yours. I love you even more when you have a mute button. I hate when you don't, because I'm afraid your voice is a bit irritating. But I would take your voice every day of the week if it means I can have one less painful human

Don't judge me for what I do with my money. I know that this purchase will leave me with very little money in my checking account. Why don't you let me worry about that and you do your damn job and fill out the

I don't know if I really want to meet you. You gave me up. I don't know what the reason is. I don't even know if there is a reason that the broken part of me will ever accept. My parents were great, but there is this feeling of abandonment. All of the things I've read about newborns and the womb and mothers justifies my

I don't understand what exactly you've done to me. Your actions and my reactions to them have caused me more varied emotions than any other single event that I can recall. I have been alternatively filled with love, anger, happiness, depression, and everything in between; sometimes switching extremes within the same

I think that you need to recalculate what your definition of “a little bit of mayo” is. I don’t think I needed half a cup for this six inch sandwich. I would like to ask you if you are okay, because you seemed to barely hear anything I said. I don’t want to say that you looked dead behind the eyes, but I prefer not to lie.

A friend came to see me today, and we went for a walk. Somehow I managed not to think about you for a few hours. I hate myself for that. I should never forget that you exist… existed. I just don’t know how to do this. I don’t know where the line is between being okay and sinking into the depths. I feel so guilty for

I need you to stop assuming that I will take care of everything. I need you to go beyond what you think is fine, because you always think that there will be plenty of time for me to finish up the projects. You think that you've put a decent enough dent in the workload and it will be good enough for me to take care of the rest. Stop that

A most bizarre thing has happened to you. I’m not sure if anyone else has noticed. It goes against much of what we all learned in the second grade, but then so many people do it I’m starting to think it’s become the norm. You’ve stopped using singular pronouns to refer to yourself.

I know you've been eating my yogurt. It has clearly had my name on it everyday this week. This community fridge comes with an implied contract of trust. You have broken that, so I've broken the part of that contract

You just walked out the door on your way to the event. I hate that I couldn't go with you. I wanted to be there to celebrate your triumph with you. I know you said that it's okay, and I am glad you understand. But it is not okay. It is not okay that I have to work and can't be there for your shining moment. I love you so much and I hate

Please stop talking to me. I can't answer your questions when you have your hands in my mouth. Not that I would want to if you didn't. I understand that you are trying to put me at ease, but this is a business

I saw C the other day and she mentioned you. I just wanted to write to see how you are. She told me you're in Minneapolis and that you're doing well. Married with a couple of kids. Sounds like you're living the American Dream. I hope you're doing okay, really, because I know that's not the dream you dreamed when I knew you. I think

It was a typical morning. I was running behind and crabby because I didn't want to go to work. I'm quickly coming to a place where I hate my job and that makes me hate every aspect of my life. But then I saw you. Through the shuffle of people entering and exiting the train I saw you through the window, standing on the

I was standing on the platform this morning and I saw you on the train. When we made eye contact I felt a strange electric jolt in my body and I recognized you on a cosmic level, knew in that moment that you were the person I was supposed to be with. I never believed in love at first sight, always thought it was complete

Sometimes I think about what might happen if we meet again five, ten, maybe even twenty years down the road. I imagine all sorts of scenarios, each more sickening than the last. As much as I hate to admit it, I usually picture you confessing what a mistake you made and how you never

Enjoy all that leg room while you can buddy. I was like you once, sitting in an airplane seat with my legs straight out and not yet reaching the seat in front of me. Now look at me, with my knees up by my chest. I have…

I've been avoiding you lately. I'm sorry about that. I have a reason. I don't know if it's a good reason or not, you'll have to let me know. I've been avoiding you because I want you around. It sounds incredibly crazy, but it's the truth. I want you

When I think of you I think of possibility.  I think of those beaches we walked along, when all I wanted to do was hold your hand.  I think of the talks we had, and how scary and comforting and wonderful they were.  I think of how easily the conversations flowed with the understanding that passed between us.  There was